No, it’s not always easy to talk to your father. Sometimes it’s embarrassing to show yourself. Or what is common for one generation is strange for another. As for me, I think that for years politics strengthened my relationship with my father: we were both interested and had something to talk about. Of course it was something outside of our most personal lives, our hopes and our defeats.
But there is always – or can be – time. My father, an engineer and a very rational man by nature, began to explore different worlds as he grew older. For example yoga. For example, take time to read to people with visual impairments. Other dimensions entered his life and this expanded the topics of conversation. And I have changed too. When I was single, I jealously guarded my privacy. After I got married and had children, I opened up to it and made him more of a participant in my daily universe. We are both changing.
And me as a father? I don’t know… yeah, I’ll try. When they were children, I made up stories that they loved. Insane plots based on popular characters like Ben 10 or Rapunzel. With my mania for rewriting history, I made these protagonists take unexpected paths. But everyone happy. When I started running, I took part in races with them: 10 kilometers for the adults, 3 for the children. The idea was to share, to know how to be together.
Today, as teenagers and a little more, they are at the moment when life takes them into their own spaces. For me it’s not hard, I think it would be harder to feel that they’re not taking off and that they’re missing wings. Even if the physical time you spend together becomes more and more limited, I try to make it intense and not superficial. Who knows. I’m sure I’m doing something wrong, but no one has achieved wisdom.
When I imagine being old, I think about what our bond will be like. Will we live nearby? The future has its twists and turns and unknowns, but I want to avoid absorbing it as much as possible. In the broadest sense, take care of ourselves, not me. Let her live her life, not mine.
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