You can have sex to self-medicate or to calm fears. It is possible that this practice becomes a hostile act that some people ignore. The field of meaning, of different meanings for sex It is also a procedure in which the practice is divorced from the implication, even from the sexual identity, of the person performing it.
It’s never just sex tells us Darian leader from the title of his book published by Editorial Sexto Piso, a material that deals with those moments in which Sex is something differentsomething completely different than the idea of an encounter between people who desire or desire and also love each other.
The truth is that this split between action and meaning, this possibility of giving a name to a practice and having to comment without hesitation that it was just sex, that is, that it was not the case It was very important to us, it meant nothing, is interviewed here by the British psychoanalyst to confirm this Sex is always more than we thinkthat the moment we define an experience, we manifest something of our psyche, of our behavior, that we prefer to dismiss.
The question Leader asks, which encompasses a way of thinking about analytic practice, is whether sex really isn’t talking about something else. That human gender is a cultural construction would not be a new conclusion But what is behind the social processes that lead to the practice being encouraged or transformed into a ban? What fashions do codes and models reveal to us?
As a psychoanalyst and Founding member of the London Center for Freudian Analysis and ResearchLeader works on the basis of knowledge that enables personal contact with his patients. He finds in many men a fear of intimacy that leads them to separate their feelings from moments of fornication, but also gives an important place to fantasies and sexual scripts that include a complete belief in good sexual practices.
Leader makes the fictional construction of sex the determining factor. One of his theories is based on the idea that meeting a desired person often fails because the imaginary sexual script is not fulfilled. He also found that it is very common to feel excited at the thought of another person with whom you share this sexual moment. According to Leader, it is much more common for people to be somewhere else during sexual intercourse than expected.
Turning sexuality into a story is a joyful element that involves others. They have sex to tell stories, to show off, to tell others, to compete. The possibility of recording the sexual encounter and showing it to an infinite audience is further proof that sex is a value beyond the experienced pleasure and also a means of humiliation, even ruining some people’s lives.
The social reading of the guide in this book translated by Albino Santos Mosquera is based on information about the high consumption of pornography during the pandemic, with sex in many cases serving to calm fears.
The interesting thing is to see cWhat are the emotional and psychological configurations of certain practices?accompanied by their interpretations.
From characterizations in which some men define their sexuality through the lack of emotions, through the ability to break away from any emotional attachment (something that today’s society extends to many women), to more forceful examples related to the change of sexual identity due to ideological reasons (feminist women who prefer to distance themselves from men and become lesbians) or, in a more arbitrary version, men who do not consider themselves homosexual if they have only slept with another man once or have done this for money, which shows how sexual decisions are characterized by context.
Meaning work can also be a way of dealing with the indeterminacy of sex, because it is precisely in our sexuality that something unknown and often uncontrollable about ourselves manifests itself, something that rationality does not address. The way of phrasing it, giving it more or less hierarchy, can be a strategy for it deny that you don’t always want the most beautiful or comfortable person or that sometimes that desire cannot be integrated into the life we choose.
Leader points out that the majority of women who visited his office They were much less pleased when their partner gave them what they wanted after I was asked. Not speaking, not demanding, but achieving what you want without having to adopt a demanding attitude is part of an erotic flow that contributes to satisfaction.
What that shows Sex begins long before its practice and acquires meanings that characterize it in a broader temporality. There remains something in the psyche, in the body, in the emotions that has to do not only with pleasure (or lack thereof), but also with a way of connecting fantasy and desire with the most concrete reality, which goes beyond the practice itself and ultimately exists or remains in the symbolic form of language.
It’s never just sexby Darian Leader (Sixth Floor).
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