“I am a poet and my life, words that I write on white sheets,” said Robe Iniesta in his song Lost time. But in reality, Robe was much more than a poet: a singer, a street philosopher and, for some, even a “psychologist”. “You were my personal psychologist without knowing it,” confessed a user on Twitter after learning of the death of the artist from Extremadura at the age of 63. In his lyrics, the leader and founder of Extremoduro explores intense human emotions like pain, internal struggles or grieving processes. If Robe was not a psychologist, why are there those who compare him to such a psychologist? EL PAÍS contacted four mental health experts to analyze some of their most listened to songs and the success of their lyrics.
“Robe wasn’t afraid to talk about her injury”
“Robe spoke, wrote and sang without makeup. He did not avoid the injury, he looked at it face to face, directly. And this, in a felicological and thanatophobic society, which avoids pain at all costs, is revolutionary,” explains José González, psychologist expert in the mourning process. His words cut through uncomfortable emotions “in an honest, unhurried and non-judgmental way.” Because if there is something that characterizes the singer, it is that “he was not afraid to speak since the injury”. He understood that “pain is not a system failure, but rather a constituent part of life.” And it is precisely for this reason that his work evokes so much relief: “Because it gives us permission to feel in a society that censors sadness. »
A sadness that many people feel when faced with a loss like that described in the song. To wait for of Estremoduro.
Live looking at a star
Still waiting.
These lines that Robe speaks reflect what in mourning we call continuous bonds, according to González: “Our imaginary umbilical cord remains connected to the object of mourning after his death. On the one hand, we know that we must look to the future, but, on the other hand, we feel connected to the past, as if we are waiting for the person to return.
Dream of her hair
And the wind comes and takes it away
And since then, his head has only been asking to take flight
Blonde drinks beer to remember her hair
Although we consciously and rationally know that it is not possible for someone to return after death, “emotionally, there is usually a need to remain connected to the loved one.” “Far from being a mistake or something to avoid, it is something that we must integrate and support as mourners,” says González. Robe reflects that sadness is not only common to all humans, but is necessary to deal with loss and learn to let go. Also “that anger, contradiction or hurt are part of the human experience and that it is only when we give them space that we can transform them”. This look, according to the psychologist, is very useful and valuable in any grieving process.
“Today we mourn not only the artist, but also the person we were when we listened to him,” says González. Robe has witnessed the stages of life of many of his fans: “Adolescence, breakups, anger, disappointments, nights of freedom…”. And that’s not all: it gave a name to what many people experienced before they even understood what was happening to them. This is indicated by González, who assures that what helps a grieving person the most is not that it takes away their pain, but that it helps them to understand it and give it a place. This is exactly what Robe did through art. Even today, after his death, his work can become a continuing link: a way of “continuing to interact with him through what he left behind”.
“Start again”
For Elena Daprá, health psychologist, psychological wellness expert and behavioral analyst, Robe’s words seem “raw, vulnerable, contradictory, sometimes delusional and deeply real.” “It generates an identification because we have all felt at some point that we were out of place, that we did not understand or that we were overwhelmed and it names what many people do not know how to say: confusion, emotional disorder, the desperate search, irony in the face of pain or the need to be reborn,” he emphasizes. His words comfort those who listen to them, showing that they are not alone. This shared recognition, according to Daprá, “is therapeutic.”
the song temporary madnessaccording to Daprá, addresses disorientation, saturation, desire, emotional dependence, identity crisis and rebirth. “Psychologically, it is the portrait of someone who feels lost between reason and madness, between the desire to disappear and the desire to start again,” he says. And he refers to emotional dysregulation: “That moment when the mind stops being a good interpreter of what we feel. »
I suffer from temporary madness
I descend to earth and cross
The dividing line
What separates, in this story
Madness and reason
In this Extremoduro song, Robe also states, “I am still my war.” This idea, according to Daprá, is “very powerful” because it shows that “the real battle is usually internal and not external.” And the theme of love “as an anchor or refuge” also appears:
Rigid
I’m still stiff
The same trajectory
And I don’t understand why you move further away
This fragment reflects, according to the psychologist, a very common experience: “When the emotional bond breaks, the inner world collapses. » And finally a few words on resilience:
And to start again
Again and again
“It’s the idea that, even after chaos, human beings have the ability to start again,” explains Daprá. The psychologist considers that these types of songs normalize internal conflicts, give language to discomfort, enable treatment and invite resignation. Robe’s music accompanies, but “it doesn’t soften, it doesn’t judge and it shows that there is a way out even if it hurts”: “It gives hope and it’s very powerful. The listener sees themselves reflected and can begin to put words to what was previously pure mental noise and caused them to be in a loop or constant discomfort.” Something key in psychology: “What is named, is supported, creates a reality. What is recognized can be transformed.”
When words hurt and accompany
Robe’s words touch many people because “at some point in our lives we have all felt this with more or less intensity”, according to Vanesa Fernández López, doctor of psychology and professor at the Complutense University of Madrid: “Sadness, longing, grief or anguish are emotions that make us feel bad, but the truth is that they are adaptive and are present in our daily life. They warn us that things are going wrong and that we must go forward.
Fernández analyzed The bird mana song that “expresses emotions related to melancholy, depression and sadness”. “It seems to me that it is a mourning for a person who misses him and also a mourning for himself, for who he was.”
And I looked in the mirror
And my reflection wasn’t there
I had to disappear.
“You notice this emptiness and feel that you are no longer the same person. You look in the mirror and you don’t see your reflection,” says Fernández. As the expert points out, grief is closely linked to depression and Robe describes, in these words, “a depressed state of mind”.
I get out of bed
I woke up without desire
Tonight I didn’t sleep well…
…. I haven’t eaten anything today
Who knows if tomorrow
I know I’m thinner
Fernández considers that The bird man It has a “pessimistic, sad and distressing” tone. In addition to loss, the song is also about “longing, doubt, anguish and even emotional instability.”
I notice that something is missing today to be
What do I need today to be
Like I’m lacking weight
Aware of my volatility
What is love made of?
“Robe spoke from a more scientific perspective than many mental health popularizers today,” says Mari Zafra, psychologist and creator of Psikigai. For her, Robe is not just the lyrics of her songs, but the philosophy with which she sees life. He composed from a “raw truth”. In his work, “he speaks of both pain and happiness, like a continuum”. “Sartre, Camús or Simone de Beauvoir are thinkers who would listen to their music or inspire it,” explains the expert who analyzed the song. Ellipse.
As Zafra points out, Robe does not reject pain, but rather experiences it as one of the precious things in life. In this song, he addresses “the contingencies of love and life”: “The hugs, the wind… What we can experience in our flesh and which gives meaning to trying something as long as it doesn’t remain in ellipses. » “It can go wrong, of course, it can go wrong. But life is a continuous absurdity, it matters a lot and, at the same time, if it goes wrong, then nothing happens either, beyond the pain,” says the psychologist.
I will teach
my most beautiful teeth
I’ll try
Let nothing go wrong this time
Robe explains how human beings can become addicted to pain and the importance of looking for a way out. “We can’t stop bad things from happening, but we can see how we deal with them,” says Zafra.
Remind me to find a way out
If you see I’m lost inside
Remind me to forget this hurt
Let my heart break
Robe asks what love is made of and invites us to focus our attention on what really gives meaning to life: “Pure hugs, pure wind… Experiences that are not the content of our thoughts, but the direct experience of life,” explains Zafra. Because Robe knew a lot about life: he spent all his time looking for the next step and teaching us to love and expand our souls. “We don’t want metaphors or stories about monks who climb mountains barefoot and who mean nothing to us in our daily lives. We want Robe to sing to us that we try not to make mistakes, that we are afraid and that we have doubts, that we live the experience of a hug,” says the psychologist. With his departure, many will feel like they are in a bind. But his music will always remain as a guide and a companion.
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