My father has a famous story, one that we all have within us, a “story” that happened at some point in our lives and that, for whatever reason, instead of being relegated to oblivion like so many others, is forever etched into the cortex.
In the case of this story in particular, I believe that its immortalization was due, firstly, to the distance and frustration it generated, but, secondly, to the moral that my father was able to draw from it. It is also this moral that allowed the story to acquire the status of an anecdote, the one that is told to groups of friends around a table or to girls who ask for advice, as was so often the case with me.
The story goes more or less like this:
In his early twenties, with a wife and children, dissatisfied with the job he had at the time, my father came across a job offer at a famous multinational company that manufactured razor blades. He then decides to go there to find out more and sell his fish. This company bought it. After two or three interviews, he is offered the position which comes with a good salary and a promising career plan.
Legend has it that after sealing the deal with a handshake, the future boss looked my father in the eye and said, “Now all I have to do is shave this beard.”
What might seem like a joke was actually a demand. Apparently the multinational didn’t hire anyone with facial hair.
My father refused the offer. “If you made cigarettes, would you force me to smoke?” » » he asked when communicating his decision.
When I first heard the joke, I was preparing to take the entrance exam and doubts about which course to take consumed me. Sitting next to him in the passenger seat of the car, I stared at the road as his words reached my ears.
At the end of the story, I remained silent, somewhat enraged by the apparent lack of connection between my dilemma and the facts recounted. Behold, the connection has been established.
“You were born because I decided not to shave my beard. If I had shaved it and accepted this job, I would not have changed cities, I would not have ended up in Salvador and I would not have met your mother,” he said, with the smile of satisfaction of this storyteller when he knows that he has captured the attention of the listener.
I looked at him for the first time since the conversation started, raising my eyebrows. He followed:
“Life is made of decisions, my daughter. Every moment of every day we decide to take one path rather than another. To cross the street or not. To go to an event or not. To advance or not to a sign. To shave our beard or not. But most of the time, we do not even realize that we are choosing something and that this choice also represents a renunciation. Therefore, do not put all this pressure on the decision you have to make. Awareness of the possible consequences of a choice doesn’t make it more important or more correct than all the other decisions you made today without even thinking twice.”
Throughout my life, I have heard this story many times, but I didn’t need it. I turn around and move, repeating to myself the words spoken in that car.
A few months ago I made the decision to return to Brazil after ten years of living abroad, and since then I have thought about this story every day. I decided to shave my beard, now I have to contain my anxiety and let life do what it does best, surprise.
PRESENT LINK: Did you like this text? Subscribers can access seven free accesses from any link per day. Just click on the blue F below.
About The Author
